Sasha Grey’s hey day is behind us. And anal sex is no longer the prerogative of porn stars and the ultimate male fantasy. But surely this practice requires a delicate approach, preparation, and, of course, mutual desire.
Getting ready
So you decided to try anal sex. To make the process comfortable and safe, we recommend to approach it in a delicate and responsible manner.
- Make sure that food intake happens at least a few hours before the intended practice.
- To avoid worrying about the smell and the unwanted traces, take a soft laxative, for example Microlax.
- Make sure that the atmosphere is comfortable and safe: the usual atmosphere of the bedroom, constant partner, pleasant mood.
- Discuss what and how you want to do in anal sex. Is it going to be anal toys, fingers or cock. Agree on a safe word.
Scenario
The first anal sex is similar to the first sexual experience. It requires a subtle foreplay and caution.
- Give your partner a good warm up. Let the foreplay be long — kissing, caressing, undressing slowly. Arousal is the key to pleasure. Get your partner to relax. Do an erotic massage, massage the buttocks and inner thighs.
- Slowly step by step, get to the action. Circle the sphincter with soft finger movements, touch it with tongue. You can use a latex oral dam or a condom as protection.
- Slowly get inside. It’s best to start with a little rubber or silicone plug, or with one finger at a time. In both cases use a condom: this will ensure a smooth surface and make the procedure hygienic. Don’t be shy on the lubricant — the better the lubrication, the safer the penetration process.
- If you are the “bottom”, try to relax. By default, the external sphincter is contracted, but it can be controlled. To let the pleasuring object into your body, you have to work it as if you are trying to relieve yourself. This will widen the anal opening, and the object will go in easier.
- Leave enough time. Anal penetration is a new and unusual experience for the body. It will take 10-30 minutes to overcome discomfort.
Warning:
- Don’t use a glass plug if it’s your first time.
- Don’t use silicone lubricant with silicone plugs — it will damage the surface of the toy.
- Avoid lubricants with lidocaine. You can damage the mucosa without noticing it because of the lidocaine.
- Pain is not to be tolerated. Anal sex discomfort is allowed, but in the case of acute pain stop.
- Choose comfortable poses. For the first time, having anal sex lying on the side will be the most comfortable.
- If you are “top”, comment on your actions and ask for feedback. If you are the “bottom”, correct the “top”, stop if necessary, and advise what would be a better way to do.
The anal area is intimate to many people, and interacting with it for the first time can be a vivid experience. Aftercare is an extremely important wrap-up practice here. It is an expression of caring for each other after any emotional practice. Especially for anal sex newbies. Hug the “bottom” partner, touch gently, wonder how it went, what should be changed.